How
to improve my Food Blog Proposal
After
the peer review on Monday, I had several comments made by my classmate in
English class suggesting ways to improve my food blog proposal. My classmate suggested
that I should avoid excessively using phrases such as “I want” and “I plan”
throughout the proposal. I will incorporate that suggestion since the proposal
is already understood to be my plans and goals for my food blog. To repeat “I
want” and “I plan” throughout the food blog proposal will just create
unnecessary repetition of an already known fact. My partner also commented on
how I did not name my food blog in my proposal. A name is vital to the paper
because it is usually the hook to draw people into reading the paper with
interest. I will add a title to my food blog proposal, which will be “Beer,
Wine, and the Cultural Significance.” Another comment my partner made was to
provide a clearer understanding in one of my closing statements. Since I wrote
“we can progress further” with no context, I will revise the sentence to make
it more understandable, clearing any confusion as to I am trying to say.
Finally, he wrote that my food blog idea was interesting and loved the
direction I am going. With that compliment, I will continue to strive forward
to learn more about my topic and present it with passion in the future.
Original post: http://jonathanlung.blogspot.com/2016/10/how-to-improve-my-food-blog-proposal.html
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